The upper level of the Charles Van Damme was
occupied by Chris Roberts, an artist with a vision so
grand that he was considered insane even by much of
the waterfront population. He wanted to turn the
drydocks into not only a haven for artists, but the
world’s largest sculpture. His design for the project
was way beyond mere architecture, lotus-shaped and
more like a futuristic alien city you’d see on the
cover of a science fiction novel.
Roberts never came close to getting the necessary
funding for the drydocks, but he did manage to nearly
complete a three-story sculpture on a barge in Gate
Five. The “Madonna” was a gracefully curved, abstract
tower that became a tourist attraction and one of the
most photographed objects in Sausalito. It burned
down under mysterious circumstances in 1976.
A self-described “magnet for degenerates,” Chris
Roberts welcomed depraved and outrageous characters
into his home, day and night. He considered himself
in the waterfront but not of it, and it sometimes
seemed as if he was letting the people he referred to
as “sub-human comic strip characters” hang around to
help maintain his illusion of his own superiority. He
hated all rock and roll music, especially the Redlegs,
preferring Broadway show music like “Oklahoma” and
gentle bossa nova tunes. But he had no beef with us
as individuals.
His wife was an actress named Laura Ash, who not
only tolerated Chris’s hangers-on, but fed them when
she wasn’t in Los Angeles working in “B” movies. She
and Chris had a vision of the Ark as a theater rather
than a rock and roll dance hall, and stirred up some
interest for the idea with their friends in Hollywood.
Two of these were Rip Torn and his wife, Geraldine
Page. They arrived at Gate Six with their twin sons,
set up camp in the Ark with Chris and Laura, and for a
while settled into the waterfront life. Like Laura
Ash, Page was fond of feeding people, and huge
dinners in the Ark became regular events. Rip,
meanwhile, became an instant Redlegs fan and regularly
drank and took drugs with the band and the Truly Rank
Motherfuckers. His willingness to inhale various
powders earned him the nickname “Rip Snort,” and he
seemed pleased when I Redlegged him.
Torn was a Nixon freak. He had been obsessed with
Tricky Dicky since the early fifties, when as a young
actor he had been blackballed as a result of the
McCarthy era communist purges in Hollywood. At a
private showing, we saw a movie he produced in which
he plays Shakespeare’s “Richard the Third” as Nixon.
Between footage of Vietnam atrocities and nuclear
explosions, Torn-as-Nixon slowly turns into a hideous
werewolf-like monster.
When the Redlegs set up a gig at Whitey
Litchfield’s Bermuda Palms in San Rafael. Torn asked
to be on the show.
“Yeah, sure,” we said, “What will you do?”
“Just leave that to me,” he said.
He didn’t want his name used, so we listed him on
the poster as “Elmore Star,” since “Elmore” is his
real first name. The day of the dance, we heard rumors
that Torn had been up all night working on his act,
fashioning rubber prosthetic devices and practicing
his Nixon voice. He’d also been to the Gate Three
junkyards looking for props.
The Bermuda Palms was packed, and Flying Circus
did the first set. Then it was time for the Mystery
Guest. Rip Torn walked on stage in full Nixon
costume, complete with rubber nose and jowls, pushing
a shopping cart with a World War II bomb in it. He
was met with equal amounts of cheers and boos. After
muttering a few remarks about growing up in Whittier,
Nixon-Torn looked intently into the audience and
asked, “Do you like Dick?”
A roar of approval went through the crowd and the
floor in front of the stage was suddenly filled with
clean-cut all-American-looking young men.
Torn looked straight at them and repeated the
question.
“Do you like Dick?”
“YEAH!” shouted the young Republicans.
“Do you REALLY like Dick?”
“YEAH!”
“Well SAY it, then.”
“WE LIKE DICK!”
Torn raised his arms, but instead of the Nixon
V-for-victory sign, he extended the middle finger of
each hand, holding them out in a double “fuck you”
salute and shouted: “Well, then SUCK DICK,
DICKSUCKERS!”
Apparently the clean-cut crowd neither appreciated
the Nixon impression nor did they like being called
“dicksuckers.” They stormed the stage and attacked
the costumed actor. In a second, mike stands were
flying, amps and drums were falling over as Marin
County’s nice young men pummeled and thrashed at the
grotesque figure of Richard Milhous Nixon. The usual
waterfront “security force,” led by Don Bradley, Dean
Puchalski and Sam Anderson, went into action and
cleared the stage while Geraldine Page sat calmly on
the floor in front of the stage drinking white wine
and eating Sonoma jack cheese and French bread.
During Rip Torn’s stay on the waterfront, he acted
in a movie that Larry Moyer was making, called
“Harry’s Movie.” There was a scene filmed in Gate 5
that was supposed to be a typical waterfront party,
outside on a barge with the Redlegs playing. In the
scene, Torn, as Harry the moviemaker, does some wild
dancing with Margo St. James, the former prostitute
and founder of the San Francisco hookers’ union called
C.O.Y.O.T.E. (Call Off Your Old Tired Ethics -- the
name was John Stephens’ idea). Margo was wearing a
nun’s habit and a large rubber dildo. This was not
actually “typical” of waterfront parties but hey, it
was a movie, right? As far as I know, the film was
never finished, perhaps due to a self-fulfilling
prophecy written into the script at the end, where the
“Harry” character is asked, “What about the movie?”
And Harry says, “Fuck the movie.”
The band played on, the cameras rolled until dark.
Naturally, the party “scene” had become a real party
and it took a while to wind down. While we were
packing up the equipment, Gate 5 resident John Murphy
volunteered to bring it back to the Oakland for us in
his rowboat. There was nothing unusual about this, we
moved electrical gear by water all the time. Murphy
had a large and very stable river skiff which could
easily carry the stuff. We would meet him at Gate 6.
Back at the Oakland, we waited for Murphy. When
he came into sight rounding the Gate 5 pier everything
seemed all right, but when he was halfway from there
to the pier where we stood, I could hear Murphy saying
something.
“I can’t believe this, I can’t believe this is
happening...” As he came into the range of light from
the Oakland, I could see that something wasn’t right.
Murphy’s skiff was sitting lower in the water than it
should. “I can’t believe this,” he said again. His
boat was sinking. By the time he was almost to the
pier, the skiff was completely sunk, Murphy was
standing waist-deep in the water, and drum cases and
speaker cabinets were floating all around him. He
threw his arms up in the air and repeated, “I can’t
believe this.” We got another boat and retrieved the
equipment.
We were using Fender amplifiers, two Concert
models for the guitars and a Dual Showman for the
bass. Joe Tate, the techno-expert of the group,
suggested we get the amps into a hot shower right away
to get rid of the salt. This we did in the Oakland
shop shower, then borrowed a hair dryer somewhere and
blew the electronic innards dry. We gave them all a
healthy squirt of WD-40 and let them sit overnight.
The next day, all the amps worked as if nothing had
happened.
Rip Torn on fame and fortune: “Every offer is a
sandwich. It’s a big, juicy, delicious-looking
sandwich, but hidden in the middle, there's a tiny dab
of shit. It’s so small you don't even taste it. So
you eat the sandwich, and it’s good, but the next
sandwich has just a little more shit in it, and so on,
until you're eating nothing but pure shit.”
When Judy Stone reviewed “The Last Free Ride” in
the San Francisco Chronicle, she wrote, “The film
stars Joe Tate...as a prototype of the free-wheeling
young people who live in the idiosyncratic hulks and
barges along the waterfront...playing with his
insanely self-destructive band...” That perspective
was not arrived at solely from seeing the movie. Word
was out in the business that we were crazy, and
definitely dangerous.
Lee Houskeeper was a booking agent, or something
like that, from Los Angeles, who showed up with Bob
Seal at the Oakland one night. Seal was a Georgia
guitar player with a degree in English and a
near-perfect singing voice. He was the vocalist I had
hired for the demo back in the City, as well as a
friend of Joe Tate. Houskeeper listened to the band
for awhile, told us he was impressed, and said he
could get us a record deal if we signed a contract
with him as personal manager.
The figure mentioned was $50,000, as an advance on
royalties. Houskeeper produced a contract. We read
it carefully and saw in the fine print that if we
signed, we would technically be in debt to Lee
Houskeeper for $50,000.
Joe and I left the shop to write up a contract of
our own as an alternative. It stated that “Lee
Householder shall give the Redlegs one million dollars
in cash and expect nothing in return.”
“His name is Houskeeper, Joe,” I said.
“I know,” he replied.
We showed it to Houskeeper and he acted very
hurt, but said nothing when we pointed out his fine
print.
“But I had such a beautiful deal for you guys,” he
whimpered, “You could make it big and I could be your
manager...”
“The only thing big about this is your assumption
that we're naive enough to go for this bullshit,” I
said.
“FUCK a buncha bullshit,” muttered Joe, turning
on the bandsaw. He started cutting scrap lumber into
stove-sized chunks, ramming the pieces hard into the
blade so the machine screamed and smoked.
Houskeeper looked around, hoping for sympathy or
reassurance. Seal was struggling not to laugh, but
managed a neutral-looking shrug. Houskeeper gathered
his papers and left. On the way out he was still
saying, “But it was such a beautiful deal...”
Back in the Haight-Ashbury I had run into a
musician friend from New York who was recording with
Country Joe McDonald. He’d invited me to the session
at Pacific High Recording, where I got hired by
haranguing McDonald’s wife, and then McDonald himself,
about my ability to “play the right thing” on any
particular track. It paid off. I wound up playing
three dates for them, on the payroll of Vanguard
records.
Re-entering the musical mainstream even for short
periods was a strange experience, an almost violent
reality shift. Despite McDonald’s reputation as an
anti-war activist and all-around Berkeley radical, in
the studio he was polite, mild-mannered, and almost
ploddingly professional in his approach to recording.
Only two years earlier, I would have found this scene
interesting, even exciting. Now, even this “radical”
and the musicians he worked with seemed ordinary.
However, at that point I still believed there was
a place for me and the Redlegs in the music business,
and getting calls from McDonald’s management
reinforced this notion. Maybe he could help get the
band a recording deal...
I called him at home and asked if he’d listen to a
tape of my band. He said he would. He greeted me
cordially at his house in Berkeley, and offered me
lunch, which I refused. When I started talking about
the Redlegs, he seemed suddenly distracted, and
countered with the information that he was already
producing a record for some band or other. He never
listened to the tape.
George Daly, A & R head of Columbia Records for
San Francisco, invited us to their studios in the City
to do some taping and discuss making an album. He was
tall and thin with long dark curly hair, and dressed
in a green velvet suit. The first thing he said when
we arrived was, “I bet you didn’t think I looked like
this,” as if we had spent half the day wondering about
his appearance. As we set up the equipment, Daly
walked around the studio dropping famous names. “Bob
Dylan” this, “Taj Mahal” that, looking at us, trying
to measure our reactions.
When everything was ready, he sat in the control room
and spoke through the earphones we wore.
“Okay, let’s try one.”
We were eight or nine bars into “Sailor's Love
Song” when Daly’s voice cut through the earphones,
“STOP!”
We stopped.
“Okay, do it again just like you did the first
time.”
We did.
“Hold it, hold it. Let’s do it again.”
And again, and again.
“Whoa, wait a minute, stop,” he said. “I know
what’s wrong now. The bass is out of tune.” Kim
tuned the bass, and we finally got all the way through
the song.
Later on in the control room, Daly cornered me.
He suggested that our bass player wasn't up to snuff
and added, “I’m a bass player, you know.”
“This is the band you asked for, this is the band
you get,” I replied.
Joey overheard this, walked over to Daly and
looked him in the eye, saying, “We like our bass
player.”
“Oh, he's a brilliant bass player,” said Daly.
He was getting nervous.
After another futile attempt to work under Daly’s
direction, we quit playing and drank beer in the
control room while the tape rolled. Maggie fell
asleep on the floor. Joe and I started talking about
bands that sign big recording contracts and become
nothing but products, disposable “acts,” washed out
and eviscerated by people just like George Daly, who
was now clearly shaken and pretending to make
“important phone calls.”
We packed up and left, secure in the knowledge
that Columbia Records would not be calling us again.
There was always someone or other wanting to
promote, exploit, or otherwise get their hooks into,
that is to say, make money off the Redlegs band. Some
were serious professional vultures, while others were
relatively inept dilettantes. Or in 90’s terms,
wannabes.
Two such young men showed up at the Oakland one
day. Their names were Bruce and Todd, or something
like that. They were collegiate in appearance,
relatively clean-cut. The Redlegs band had
“impressed” them, they said, and with the two of them
as our management team, “we could all make a lot of
money.” We agreed to meet at their office/residence
in The City and discuss a possible “arrangement.”
The office/residence was an apartment in the
Sunset district. It contained no evidence of previous
dealings in the music business. Bruce and Todd served
drinks and told us their ideas about booking and
promoting the band. There was nothing new or
interesting about any of it.
All of us, particularly Joe Tate, often became
restless and claustrophobic when “trapped” in small,
sterile, box-like spaces such as city apartments.
Even though we lived on small boats, they were not
box-shaped or symmetrical, and being on them was more
like “camping” than staying indoors.
Joe was getting bored and I sensed that he was
about to go into one of his gross-out routines. (He
once got rid of a homosexual promoter-type by reading
heterosexual pornography out loud while the agent
tried to sign us to a contract.)
As Joe fidgeted, Maggie, Joey and Kim sat there
with the two managers, drinking up their booze, and I
snooped around the apartment. I found nothing of
interest until I opened the door to the hall closet.
There, neatly wrapped and stacked, were about a
hundred “bricks,” or kilos of marijuana. So this was
their game. The motivation of the two managers, Bruce
and Todd, was now clear. If they could get “in” with
a rock & roll band by signing on as management, the
group’s following would be a ready-made market for
their weed.
Joe’s voice was getting louder and more offensive,
and I knew we would be leaving soon. I grabbed one of
the bricks and went back to the living room, where Joe
was now urinating out of Bruce and Todd’s third story
window.
“You guys won’t be minding if I take one of these,
will you?” I asked, holding the kilo up for all to
see. The two managers, already shocked by Joe’s
behavior, were quick to grasp my suggestion of
blackmail and likely glad I was taking only one brick.
“Let’s say you’re fronting this stuff to us,
okay?” I said. They nodded.
Bruce and Todd were as glad to see us go as we
were to leave. Needless to say, no contract was
signed, but all the pot smokers at Gate 6 got free
bags of dope the next day.
Keystone Korner was a jazz club, booking the big
names like Monk and Mingus until 1971, when the format
was changed to rock. The name was derived from the
club’s location right across the street from a police
station.
If they wanted rock and roll, they got it with the
Redlegs. The place filled up with waterfront
regulars, including Michael Woodstock and his retinue
of pot-smoking hippie followers.
We actually got the band set up right on time at
nine o’clock, and the instruments were in tune. For
once it seemed like nothing was going wrong. Everyone
was up and dancing; we were playing really well. I’d
bet there wasn’t a recording device of any sort within
a three block radius.
Near the end of the first song, the bar manager
walked up to me, beckoning with his forefinger. Here
it comes, I thought.
“There’s NO DANCING allowed here,” he shouted in
my ear, “You’ve got to TELL THEM TO STOP DANCING.”
With a reasonably straight face and a decent
attempt at a sincere tone of voice, I made the
announcement. “The word from the management is NO
DANCING IN THIS CLUB.”
The crowd, still on their feet waiting for the
next number, groaned and hissed as they sat down.
“Who ever heard of a rock and roll club with no
dancing?” yelled Michael Woodstock. He had opened
one of his bags and started rolling joints.
“Well, it looks like we’ve got one here,” I said
back into the mike. Joe was getting a cloudy look in
his eye. He didn't like this kind of distraction.
“Now don’t get excited,” he said to the audience, “You
heard the rules.” He signalled to Joey and tore into
“Reelin’ and "Rockin’”, his favorite Chuck Berry song,
emphasizing the words: “I looked at my watch and it
was nine twenty-one, we’re at a ROCK AND ROLL DANCE
havin’ nothin’ but fun...” Instantly, the whole
crowd was back up and at it. Even the waitresses were
dancing.
This time the manager waited until the song was
over. By now he had recognized Joe as bandleader and
spoke to him.
“Okay, everybody. No dancing allowed,” Joe
announced.
“BULLSHIT! FUCKABUNCHA BULLSHIT!” shouted Penny
Woodstock. “We came here to DANCE!”
I looked at Joe. The cloudy look was gone, his
eyes were very clear. “This is already past the point
of being just plain ridiculous,” he said, as Michael
Woodstock passed a lit joint to the stage.
“There's been a request,” I reminded him.
“Fuckabunchabullshit” was a reference to our most
raucous dance number; to many it was our signature
song.
“Oh yeah, so there has.” He turned on the Vox
distortion booster built into his Fender telecaster
and played an open A chord, setting off the roaring
buzz-saw sound that always drove the Redleg crowd into
a frenzy, and screamed into the microphone, “I GOT THE
FUCKABUNCHABULLSHIT REDLEG BOOGIE BLUES...!”
Everyone danced wildly now, hooting and howling
and knocking over chairs. “I wake up in the mornin’
get my breakfast in bed, C’mere, honey, I want you to
GIMME SOME HEAD, I GOT THE FUCKABUNCHABULLSHIT REDLEG
BOOGIE BLUES...”
The manager pushed his way to the stage and
grabbed a mike, yelling into it, “There is NO DANCING
allowed here! You MUST STOP DANCING. It’s AGAINST
the LAW to DANCE here. I can smell MARIJUANA and the
POLICE STATION IS RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET!”
Joe shoved him off the stage with his foot,
sending him sprawling face first on the dance floor.
The place HAD a dance floor. “I can’t stand it when
anybody messes with my equipment,” he explained.
We packed up in record time and did not ask to get
paid. On the way out, I was greeted by George Daly
from Columbia Records, who had been standing by the
door the whole time (twenty minutes). With a huge,
uncharacteristic grin, he said, “You guys are the best
rock and roll band I ever heard, but you’re absolutely
unrecordable.”
The Redlegs may have been the only band ever to
get the bum’s rush, physically ejected, from the
Winterland Ballroom. A converted ice show and hockey
arena, it was the big rock & roll venue in San
Francisco, Bill Graham’s logical progression from the
Fillmore.
We got the gig by a fluke. The Sun King had given
us a Sansui stereo amplifier, which we promptly put up
for sale in the Classified Gazette for money to buy
Roy Cano’s ‘47 Chevy panel truck. The guy who
answered the ad asked why we were selling it. When
Joe told him we wanted to buy a truck for our band,
the guy asked what band it was. He turned out to be
Jerry Pompili, the manager of Winterland. Apparently
he had heard of the Redlegs, and offered us a date
there.
He bought the stereo, too. We used the money to
buy the truck and named it the Znarghmobile, after a
Gahan Wilson cartoon in which a slimy green outer
space monster lands on Earth and says, as humans flee
in panic, “One small step for a Znargh, a giant stride
for Znarghkind.”
The Redlegs would be the suicide squad (warm-up
band) for Commander Cody, Buddy Miles, and the J.
Geils Band, and be paid $100. We arrived at
Winterland in the Znarghmobile and took our equipment
in through the backstage freight door. Thirty or
forty waterfront regulars were along for the trip,
giving the appearance of a big road crew. They did
help carry the equipment--after all they got in free
that way--but none of them knew or cared about the
technical end of things, and they all headed for the
backstage complimentary beer, kept in garbage cans
everywhere.
We barely had time to tune up, let alone have a
sound check. There’d been no such offer anyway, since
we were only a local group with no record deal. This
was during the time when rock and roll was becoming
big business. Bill Graham was becoming as big a media
star as the headliners he booked, and his stagehands
had no concern for some local band. The stage
manager, who had given Joe some grief about tuning his
guitar (it was time to start...), introduced us by
saying, less than enthusiastically, “Let’s hear it
for... Redlegs,” not The Redlegs. It was the age of
singular rather than plural names for bands, and few
of them used “The”-- Jefferson Airplane, Grateful
Dead, even our friends’ bands had names like Flying
Circus and Contraband -- and the guy might have
thought he was doing us a favor, as if we didn’t know
who we were, by making us sound sophisticated and
up-to-date. Of course he’d never have said,
“...Rolling Stones” without “The.”
Actually, we knew only too well who we were, and
even though Joey and I still sometimes entertained
notions of commercial “success,” it had been obvious
since the beginning that the Redlegs’ destiny (and
success) was far from the mainstream music business
that Winterland represented. As I mulled over these
thoughts, Joe, as usual without counting off, started
playing “Do The Crunch.” We were in tune, but the
Built-In Failure Factor was taking effect.
As was always the case when playing someplace
“important,” we lacked the spark, the crazed energy
that caused such excitement when we felt comfortable
with our environment. The kids in the audience didn’t
know what to make of the band, mostly because they
hadn’t heard of us.
Near the end of the half-hour set, with Adam
singing “Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On,” Joe made a
stab at getting something going. He tore a piece of
railing off the stage and jumped into the audience,
and started dancing crazily among some surprised
teenage girls. This did not please the stage manager,
who saw not a symbolic breaking down of barriers, but
vandalism. Adam jumped up and stood on the Steinway
grand piano, stomping up and down on the keyboard,
waving his arm in the air. Maggie, nine months
pregnant, danced wildly. The audience was coming to
life, too. Joe’s move had gotten things started, but
it was too late. Stagehands were running around in
back of us, pointing and making the “cut” sign with
fingers across their throats, and when the song came
to an end they had our amps unplugged, in case we
tried to keep going.
As Joe stood arguing with the stage manager, Joey
and I packed the equipment, figuring a quick exit
would be best. As we carried the first pieces to the
Znarghmobile, I remembered the forty or so people who
had come with us. What had they been doing during our
set? Drinking all the free beer, painting “The
Redlegs” on the walls, and stealing hardware, that’s
what. The Winterland personnel were going nuts.
Joey, Maggie and I got the Znarghmobile loaded up, and
tried to find Joe and Kim but couldn’t. It was
getting ugly in there, and there was no point in
staying any longer.
As it turned out, Joe had been given the old
barroom heave-ho, picked up and thrown out by two
bouncers while the stage manager yelled, “You’re just
a nasty little boy!”
We never heard from anyone connected with Bill
Graham again.
It really seemed like our big break might have
come when we got the call from Ralph J. Gleason.
Gleason was one of the most respected jazz critics in
the world, and his write-ups on the San Francisco
bands had been instrumental in “legitimizing” rock
music. He was also an executive at Fantasy/Prestige,
the Berkeley record company which had been almost
exclusively a jazz label until it launched the career
of Creedence Clearwater Revival. Apparently, they
were looking for new and interesting rock groups, and
had already signed Clover, the country-rock band who
played at occasional Redlegs gigs. Even after our
unpleasant encounters with Columbia Records and Bill
Graham, I thought Gleason might understand the
Redlegs.
At Gleason’s request, Joe gathered up photographs,
posters and all the published articles on the band he
could find, including items from the Sunday Chronicle
and other newspapers, and Pete Retondo’s story in San
Francisco magazine. Our “press kit” packed in Joe’s
briefcase, we drove over to Berkeley for the meeting.
Gleason, gray-haired, dressed in a tweed jacket
and smoking a pipe, resembled a college professor. A
secretary ushered us all into a conference room and we
seated ourselves at a long oak table. Joe, who knew
Ralph from earlier days (the critic had written about
Joe’s sixties band, Salvation) made introductions.
After the obligatory small talk, Gleason pored over
the publicity material.
Without expression he said, “Well, Joe, I had no
idea you were out there destroying the foundations of
society.”
At that statement, I felt a chill run down my
back. The memory was so strong I had to fight back
the sensation of being removed in time and place to
the Arizona desert a few years before, to the car I’d
been riding in while reading “How To Talk Dirty and
Influence People” by Lenny Bruce. The book contains a
transcript of Bruce’s San Francisco obscenity trial,
with testimony by Ralph J. Gleason.
The well known critic, jazz and rock authority,
and champion of all that is hip, had in effect told a
judge, a representative of the establishment if there
ever was one, that Lenny Bruce was out to destroy the
very system that he, the judge in his black robe,
symbolized. It may never be certain what Gleason’s
intentions were, but there can be little doubt that
his testimony didn’t do much good for Lenny Bruce, and
now he was saying the exact same thing about the
Redlegs. Some of his pet groups, like Jefferson
Airplane, sang about things like revolution and
breaking down walls, but Gleason now had the distinct
impression that the Redlegs were doing them. The
irony of this was that we never even used the word
“revolution,” or phrases like “power to the people.”
This was the language of humorless fist-raisers who
liked violent confrontations with police and made long
droning speeches at demonstrations in Berkeley. When
the Redlegs said “fuckabunchabullshit,” it applied to
the revolutionaries as much as the cops. They were
all playing the same game, and we wanted no part of
it. If we were a threat to society, it wasn’t because
we challenged authority, but because we ignored it.
One instance in which the waterfront was unable to
ignore the establishment was the “houseboat battle” of
1971. It had turned into a violent confrontation, but
what is one expected to do when the police come to
(illegally) attach a chain your house and tow it away
to be wrecked?
So the Redlegs were now famous for fighting the
cops and the county government, and even Ralph J.
Gleason, the famous music critic and record company
bigwig was forgetting about the music and seeing us as
dangerous radicals. But I had a different idea of
what was dangerous. Inadvertently or not, Gleason’s
testimony -- destroying the foundations upon which our
society is built -- had helped convict Lenny Bruce of
an obscenity charge and was part of a chain of events
leading to Bruce’s death. This thought was in my
mind when Gleason started his little lecture about how
compromise was a necessity of success in life. I
began to wonder exactly what kinds of behavioral and
philosophical compromises it would take for the
Redlegs to become acceptable to the music business,
and how much of whatever it was that attracted them to
us in the first place would be left.
The conversation had turned irretrievably away
from music or recording, and the Built-In Failure
Factor was hovering like a dark cloud over the
conference table. Clearly there would be no contracts
signed here. The room was taking on a surreal air, as
if either we or Gleason and the rest of the Fantasy
staff were from some alien world and no real
communication would be possible.
Gleason continued his talk, and I heard the word
“life” come out of his mouth again. A bomb needed to
be dropped to end this potential Big Recording Deal
that was turning into an indictment, and as Gleason
looked at me and uttered “...life,” all I could think
of was Lenny Bruce... Gleason’s testimony... Lenny in
jail... Lenny dead. I spoke.
“Well, Ralph, one thing we all know about life is
that it leads to death.”
The dark cloud above the table rumbled, drizzled a
momentary cold silent discomfort, and the conversation
was over. Gleason died a few months after the
meeting. No one will ever know his real intention in
the Lenny Bruce testimony. He might even have thought
he was doing Lenny a service, and maybe he was doing
the Redlegs a favor by unintentionally driving us away
from the Music Business for the last time. We never
went back.
Bob McFee, in those days the lead guitar player
for Flying Circus, told me recently that Ralph Gleason
once wrote about me in his column. The column, says
Bob, compared him, McFee, to me and was a favorable
writeup for both of us. I had never known that
Gleason ever heard the Redlegs play or that he had
written anything about me or anyone else in the band.
Every once in a while, a face from the past
appeared at the waterfront. One of these was Willy
Havana, former agent and manager of two bands I had
been in back east. He was slick, and I was constantly
impressed by his ability to keep the bookings coming.
He weaseled us into big “showcase” clubs by
overwhelming the owners and promoters with impressive
lies and outrageous claims. It was business as usual
to him.
When he showed up at Gate Six, I figured Willy
might recognize what the band was about and be able to
translate that into some big money bookings. I was
wrong. He booked us into a gay bar on Haight St. and
it was a disaster. After that, Willy cornered me. At
first, he went on and on about how cute and beautiful
my daughter Annie was. But what he really wanted was
to ask what went wrong.
“What the hell’s happened to you?” he asked. “You
used to be one of the best. You had a great future in
the music business. Important people discussed your
guitar playing. This Redlegs band is nothing special.
What is it with you and them?”
I recalled for Willy a conversation I had had back
in Boston. A bunch of musicians and hippies had been
sitting around at a party, stoned and talking, in
typical sixties fashion, about the meaning of
everything. A drummer for one of the bands had said
something that really stuck with me: “We’re all in the
process of finding our people.” And, by no particular
effort of my own, I told him, I had found mine.
“The Redlegs can’t be measured by music-business
standards. If I had heard this group a few years ago,
I probably would have thought they weren’t any good,
just like you do now, Willy. But I was listening from
a very narrow perspective then, and things have
changed. Now, I see and hear bands like we had back
then and they seem two-dimensional. I don’t give a
shit about their hit records, it’s their lives that
are nowhere.”
“...DISAPPEARED INTO NORTHERN CALIFORNIA, NEVER TO BE
HEARD FROM AGAIN”
That prophetic line had been spoken by Bruce
Hauser, a home-town friend of mine, in Los Angeles
when Joey the drummer and I were there trying to get a
band together. Bruce had been the bass player in one
of my teenage bands, and quit to pursue the Big Time
on the West Coast. He thoroughly believed in L.A. as
the center of the musical world, and paid little
attention to anything happening outside of it except
to say that he knew of musicians who had “disappeared
into northern California, never to be heard from
again.” If it wasn’t being talked about in Los
Angeles, it didn’t exist.
When I quit high school, there was only a month to
go until graduation. The 1964 yearbook had already
been processed, so my picture was in there even though
I’d dropped out. I was one of those kids who didn’t
get involved in school activities, so the only thing
it said under the yearbook picture was “good guitar
player, will be the leader of his own band someday.”
“Someday” was only a couple of months away, and I was
out of town and working as a guitar player by the
start of the next school year.
A rock & roll musician was not a good thing to be
in a small New England town. There’d been trouble
with the police and I was happy to escape. I didn’t
say goodbye to anyone and there was no apparent
interest in my budding career. However, someone back
there must have been keeping track because people from
my high school began showing up at the oddest times
and places. Two of them even showed up on the
Sausalito waterfront. The first was a guy named
John, who I didn’t really know at all. In high school
he looked like the Ray Bolger character in the black
and white part of “The Wizard of Oz,” but now he was a
hippie. There he was in the Gate 6 parking lot,
smiling and chattering as though we’d always been
close buddies, stoned out his of mind on weed, and all
excited about it as if he’d just started. I can’t say
if marijuana “leads” to hard drugs or not, because pot
was not the first drug I used. When I did, it became
tedious very quickly and I lost interest in it. Brand
new hippies having their first pot revelations bored
the hell out of me. I wasn’t crazy about being
reminded of my home town or high school, either, and
here was home-town high-school John at Gate 6, all
goofy on weed. He was carrying a “bong,” a device
that resembled an oversized water pipe. And he said,
“I have this bong.” That’s all I can remember him
saying, and he was still saying it when I walked away:
“I have this bong...”
The other one was Billy Fortell, who had been my
friend in grade school. Our fathers drank together
and told nasty jokes. By high school, we rarely saw
each other and never hung out together. I had become
part of the wrong crowd, thoroughly disreputable, and
he was earnestly involved in his studies and
athletics.
I didn’t recognize him. He came onto the Oakland
with a full beard, calling me by name. I had to ask
him who he was. Maybe it was the beard. He was
rigged out like some kind of woodsman and the only
thing missing was an axe over his shoulder.
Fortell was one of eleven children. This may
explain the ease with which he made himself at home in
the Hot Molecule, a domicile which boasted nearly 700
cubic feet of interior space, the rough equivalent of
twelve refrigerators. We talked. He was now some
kind of social worker in Chicago, probably ministered
to people like me... When the subject of music came
up, he grabbed Maggie’s guitar and sang “Say There Mr.
Railroad Man.” And with that, the subject was closed.
He didn’t want to hear about a rock and roll group
that called itself “the worst band in the world.”
Which we did, as a play on words, a honky way of
saying “baddest.” He announced that he was going
hiking in the hills above Sausalito.
But he wasn’t a total ascetic, in fact he
developed a fascination with Marcia Exotica, who was
living in the wheelhouse of the Oakland. He called
her “the widow,” for reasons known only to him, but my
guess was that some sort of 19th-century cultural
values were coming to the surface, and it gave me the
creeps.
“Maybe I’ll marry the widow,” he mused, as if all
he had to do was pop the question and she’d fall
swooning into his arms... He went hiking alone.
When he came down from the mountain, he said he
was leaving.
“Don’t you want to stick around and hear the worst
band in the world?” I asked. “We’re playing tomorrow
night.” He said no, and I thought I’d better let him
know the awful truth about the late nights and strange
characters around here, and give him something to
report back home: “Your old friend is seriously
involved in hard drugs.” He said nothing and walked
away, his knapsack on his back.
The band seemed to thrive on what we came to call
“combat conditions.” When other groups fussed about
inadequate or faulty sound systems, made sure their
hair was right, demanded top billing and polished
their instruments, the Redlegs took the path of least
resistance, said “Fuckabunchabullshit” and plowed
through whatever obstacles there were to get the job
done. This, along with a certain characteristic
sound, was why we were called the Heavy Duty Crunch
Band.
We were hired to play an outdoor event in
Mendocino County and things started going wrong even
before we left the Gate Six parking lot. Gibbons was
carrying most of the equipment in his pickup truck.
The stuff was nearly loaded, and so were most of the
people running around getting ready to go. I was
putting guitars in the truck when someone called me to
check on something else. Leaning Kim’s Danelectro
bass guitar against the tailgate, I walked away for
just a second. During that second, Gibbons backed the
truck out and ran over the instrument, breaking its
neck in two. We managed to dig up another bass and
hit the road.
The concert site at Albion Ridge was a field on
somebody’s farm at the end of a long, dusty dirt road.
There was a huge stage piled with speaker cabinets,
and a small building erected about twenty yards in
front, housing the sound system control board and its
operators. Technicians milled about, fiddling with
wires and connections.
There was an odd feeling in the air. Four or five
hundred hippies were wandering around, some of them
carrying mason jars of dark liquid, offering drinks to
any takers. The stuff turned out to be blackberry
juice spiked with LSD, and everyone on the ridge was
drinking it. A jar came around to us. I didn’t want
to get high on acid, but I didn’t want to be the only
one who wasn’t, either. So I took the jar, which
seemed to be vibrating on its own, and drank a little.
Joey turned it down, but when the jar was gone
someone handed him a sheet of acid dots on paper, and
without hesitation he licked up the entire thing.
Meanwhile, a band had started playing. They were
called Climate, and whether it was them, or the acid
coming on, or both, something was seriously wrong.
Their sound was a cacophony of confused noise.
“Sounds like a heap of garbage cans collapsing in
an alley,” remarked Joey. As far as I could tell,
they were all playing out of tune and out of tempo in
different keys and rhythms, and totally unaware of it.
With the acid coming on stronger, the disjointed
sound became more exaggerated and unpleasant. The
lack of communication between the musicians spread
through the crowd, creating an atmosphere of tense
alienation all over the ridge. No one danced. People
moved farther and farther from the stage area, trying
to escape the weirdness, but the sound system was too
good. Climate was having some bad weather, and the
storm of sonic horror was inescapable.
When their set was finally over, psychic wreckage
was everywhere. Even the sky had gone gray. As the
area buzzed with paranoia and desperation, a bearded
man dressed in combat fatigues walked on stage and
grabbed a microphone.
“I have an announcement. Listen, everyone, I have
something very important to say.” When he finally
had the crowd’s attention, his voice raised in pitch
and became more nasal as he made his declaration:
“There is an extremely high fire danger here today...
and there is NO WATER.” As the already paranoid crowd
digested this information, we were informed that it
was time for the Redlegs to play.
As we got ready, Joey was having a hard time
remembering how to set up his drums and I wasn’t
having much luck getting my guitar in tune. Joe
wasn’t either, but I knew he wasn’t going to let that
bother him. I knew that he knew the important thing
was get the ball rolling, overcome the oppressive
weirdness, and that he would do anything to accomplish
that. Beneath his dispassionate exterior, Joe always
had his finger on the psychic and emotional pulse of
the moment, the vibrations, and he knew that under
these conditions, to hesitate is definitely to be
lost. Joey got his drums working and we started
playing the intro to “Tonight Is A Love Song.” The
situation definitely required some sort of optimism.
Joe sang one note into the microphone and the entire
sound system blew out.
This turned out to be a blessing in disguise, a
positive aspect of the ever-present Built-in Failure
Factor. Without missing a beat, Joe plugged the mike
into the second channel of his guitar amp, a Fender
Concert. With a substantial reduction in sound
quality, but no longer at the mercy of the
drug-befuddled sound crew, we continued.
Little by little, we pulled the instruments into
tune. The people who had approached the bandstand
hoping for relief began to get it and started dancing.
By the end of the first song, most of the paranoia
had dissipated and the clouds were breaking. The next
number was also a “love song,” but a hard-rocking
shuffle, and now the whole band locked into the
groove. We had defeated the weirdness. The clouds
were gone from the sky, and the sun was now going down
at our backs, its previous harsh glare giving way to a
genuine golden glow. The dancers were taking off
their clothes and swaying hypnotically with their
hands in the air, facing the sun and the band as if
involved in some ancient mystic ritual. Eventually the
sound system came back on and we finished the set with
proper sound balance, although it was clear the real
work had been done without it.
It was nearly dark when we got off. Two pickup
trucks full of beer arrived, one of them possibly for
putting out potential fires... It seemed our timing
was perfect.
vThe next band was the Mendocino All-Stars, who
were supposedly musicians from different well-known
groups who lived in the area, like Cat Mother And The
All Night Newsboys, the Sir Douglas Quintet, and who
knows who else. But in those days I had no idea who
was famous, and who was supposed to be fabulous or
important. Looking back, I see that this was the
healthiest possible way to be. As a young guitar
player back east, I was always terribly intimidated by
the presence of any “big shots” in the audience and
often choked because of their presence. In the
Redlegs I learned to not give a shit about such
things. I eventually came to see that the less in
touch with mass media culture you are, the easier it
was to just relax and live, and “do your thing.”
The beer, along with bottles of whiskey and
tequila, and joints, brought everyone down to earth.
The All-Stars were a good dance band and a good ol’
rock & roll party was in full swing. Our equipment
packed up and safe, we were ready to take in the real
show. These gigs never failed to bring the freaks out
of the woodwork, and this one was no exception.
The combination of LSD and alcohol brought very
interesting behavior out of people. I found Old
George, self-proclaimed king of the San Francisco
street population, ministering to a small group of
budding derelicts. George and I had something in
common: he had a dog named Bad Boy and I had a dog
named Bad Dog. As we discussed our canine companions,
he would occasionally take a second to advise one of
his followers, “DON’T FUCK UP.” His guttural, raspy
voice gave this statement an air of undeniable
authority, and Old George maintained his street-regal
air until the “thaxophone” guy arrived.
“Thaxophone” was a short, nerdy-looking man with a
whiny voice and a lisp, and seemed to be capable of
saying only, “I wanna play a thaxophone. Does anybody
have a thaxophone?”
“DON’T FUCK UP!” said George.
Thaxophone walked up to me and said, “I wanna
play a thaxophone. Does anybody have a thaxophone?”
I said nothing.
“DON’T FUCK UP!” repeated Old George.
“I wanna play a thaxophone. Does anybody have a
thaxophone?”
“You’re FUCKING UP!” said Old George. He was
becoming irritated.
“I wanna play a thaxophone. Does anybody have a
Thaxophone?”
“Listen, boy, you’re getting on my nerves. Can’t
you see there ain’t no saxophone around here? Now
take a walk, and DON’T FUCK UP!”
“I wanna play a thaxophone. Does anybody have a
thaxophone?”
Old George, unable to take it any more, yelled in
Thaxophone’s face. “YOU WANT A SAXOPHONE? Here, I’ll
give you a saxophone. Try THIS motherfuckin’
saxophone!” He pulled out his dick and proceeded to
urinate on Thaxophone’s shoes. Incredibly, the little
man said, “I wanna to play a thaxophone. Does anybody
have a thaxophone?”
Old George kept pissing and moving forward, aiming
higher and higher until he had Thaxophone backing
away, his pants dripping with George’s urine. Finally
the would-be reed man turned and walked slowly away,
muttering, “I wanna play a thaxophone. Does anybody
have a thaxophone?”
The inevitable conga drumming rumbled in different
corners of the field as I wandered around and ran into
Joe, and then Maggie. We were discussing the idea of
leaving when we heard loud cursing and the sound of
breaking glass. At a nearby trash barrel a tall
gray-haired man, who looked like he might have been a
lawyer or accountant, was rocketing beer bottles into
the barrel with all his considerable drunken might.
Each time he broke a bottle, he let loose a spate of
imprecations.
“God DAMN fuckin’ SHIT! Dirty rotten BASTARDS!
Stinking cunt-shit PISS! AARRGGHH!”
When he had apparently broken enough bottles, he
jumped into the barrel and started violently jumping
up and down on the glass, never breaking the streak of
curses.
“...KILL motherfuck-shit-whore-bastard!
UUGGGHHHHH! Cocksuck-motherfuckin TURD!”
The “Mendocino Glass Crusher” moved from barrel
to barrel repeating the cycle and showed no sign of
slowing down. We laughed until it hurt, but as
marvelous as this entertainment was, we had a long
drive back to Sausalito. Our forces gathered, we hit
the highway south.
We were dosed with LSD fairly often. It was in
the punch, the wine, the beer, maybe even the food.
Usually the dose was a mild one, well diluted and not
of much consequence. Also, back then I didn’t drink
much, and one or two glasses of beer or wine normally
didn’t contain enough acid to bring about any great
change. Things and people would just seem silly or
absurd for a while.
The Marin County Heliport was about half a mile
from Gate Six. At the time (1971) most of the
upstairs space in the main building was rented out to
musical groups for rehearsal space. Despite the
presence of all these musicians, there were never
parties or happenings at the heliport. The Redlegs
decided to do something about that.
One Sunday afternoon, we took a 100 ft. extension
cord and some scrap plywood and set up a makeshift
stage in the empty field just north of the main
building. With fifty or so waterfront regulars in
attendance, we just started playing, right there next
to highway 101. In a few hours the crowd grew to
three hundred or so and we played until dark with wine
and liquor flowing as if from an inexhaustible source.
No acid that first day, or the next few Sundays.
For a while, every Sunday would be Heliport Day.
Word got around. Free rock and roll parties at the
heliport. Sometimes three or four hundred people
would show up, and amazingly, the police never came to
shut us down, probably because the heliport was on
unincorporated land between Sausalito and Mill Valley.
The last time we played at the heliport was the
Night of the Big Acid Dose. We began around two in
the afternoon. It was a good day, the music was good
and the crowd big and happy. More than the usual Red
Mountain found its way to the stage and we all drank
liberally. As the sun was going down, I started to
feel the first hints of electric acid hum. Still in
the very early stages, I looked at Joey, the drummer.
“You feel it?”
“Yeah,” he said, “I’m startin’ to feel a little
crazed.”
We were used to this sort of thing, and kept on
playing. When the sun had gone down, I got the first
hint that this was going to be no ordinary mild-dose
acid trip. Knowing perfectly well that the sun was
down, I had the distinct sensation of it rising behind
my back, to the south. I could feel the warmth of
sunshine and see the rays of light. I was still “in
control,” still had a “self,” and was able to perceive
the phenomenon with some detachment. As the sunlight
effect grew, I began to play guitar with a tropical
feeling, and soon had a realistic visual sensation of
being in a saloon somewhere in the Pacific, with
swinging doors, and palm trees and the ocean outside.
(I hadn't yet been to Hawaii, and when I did get to
Maui eight years later, I found that the saloon in my
vision was the bar at the Pioneer Inn in Lahaina.)
My detachment was fading, but I do remember
thinking, I know it's dark out now and getting cold,
yet the sun is there in the wrong part of the sky and
I can feel the heat.
The drug was coming on stronger now, the effect
accelerating and building. The sun and saloon
disappeared and I was back at the heliport at night.
Music was still playing, but I looked around and saw
that Joey had vanished and a black kid we knew named
Tommy was playing the drums. It seemed he was playing
ridiculously fast, very frantic. In fact, I was the
only band member still on stage. What had happened to
them during my tropical interlude? The acid’s
acceleration was making me dizzy, disoriented. My
guitar felt like a cardboard toy. What the fuck am I
doing with this? Dropping the instrument on the
stage, I wandered into the field. I had to lay down,
and did, right in a puddle. It was raining now, but
none of that mattered. There was no room to think
about anything. My brain was surging, so busy filling
up with acid that no clear thought or perception, not
even a decent hallucination had a chance to form.
Eventually I recognized a familiar voice. It was
Saul Rouda, who apparently had not been dosed too
badly, saying, “All the heavy brain damage cases come
with me.” He herded me, along with four or five
others, into his red Volkswagen bug. On the way back
to Gate Six, he said, “Don’t worry, the band equipment
is taken care of.” This made me dimly aware that
there were other band members in the car, but I can’t
remember who. All this time the drug effect was still
building rapidly, and I began to grasp the enormity of
the dose I had received. This was far more LSD than
I had ever taken, or would have taken voluntarily.
There was time for only a fleeting moment of fear.
The surge took hold again.
Somehow, with Saul’s assistance, I wound up in the
workshop on the OAKLAND, our practice and storage room
as well as workshop. I lay down in a pile of sawdust,
glad to be in a safe place. Anyone I encountered here
would be sympathetic, no one would try and mess with
my mind. Once I was prone on the floor, I couldn’t
move and hadn’t the slightest desire to do so.
The drug was still coming on but starting to
smooth out when I became aware of voices. Joe and Kim
were in the corner discussing fine points of
engineering . This time they weren’t talking about
stepping a mast or jacking up a hull. They were
seriously discussing how to best go about moving Mt.
Tamalpais. I was able to turn my head in their
direction once, and saw Joe showing Kim a drawing of
his idea for moving the mountain. After that I
couldn't roll my head from side to side or close my
eyes. The drug was now taking full effect, and there
was no choice but to go with it. Any resistance at
this point would have been futile and dangerous.
Fighting it was how they went crazy.
I couldn’t move my head, and my eyes were open,
locked on one of the rough-hewn planks in the ceiling.
The grain and knots in the wood began to swirl and
undulate, slowly at first. People talk about seeing
“colors” and “patterns,” things that “aren’t there,”
on acid. The appearance of things and people changed
when I was on LSD, but I never had the sensation of
seeing things that weren’t there. This wood was doing
something. It was as if I had attained a different
time-frame, was vibrating at some other-worldly rate,
like a movie camera running at three or four times
normal speed, making the film seem to run super-slow.
Only for me, the wood was moving unusually fast. It
had always been moving this way, I was just seeing it
for the first time. At first it swirled and moved
side to side, seemingly at random. Then, patterns and
figures formed. Cave paintings, runes, hieroglyphics,
mystic symbols moved left to right across the wood,
slowly at first, then faster and faster, as if I were
seeing all of ancient history in few minutes.
Growing cold, aging, and dying. This is it, I’m
dead. Although I couldn’t move my head, I had a field
of vision somehow. It didn't seem as if I were out of
my body, yet I could clearly see that it was now a
skeleton gathering dust and cobwebs. There was no
feeling of fear about being dead. After all, when
you’re dead, you’re dead.
There was a new pulse of energy. From my vaguely
out-of-body yet not out-of-body perspective, I could
see something happening. Muscles and sinews,
ligaments and tendons were forming on the bones. Then
skin, and fur. The fur faded and the skin remained.
It was a living body again. Slowly, I got to my feet,
unfamiliar with physical being. I felt very old and
slow and creaky. My back wouldn’t straighten up and
my hands wouldn’t move like they should have. They
felt painful, arthritic. I looked at them; they were
black. The palms were pink, the nails were long and
brittle. All this was no surprise. I was an old
black man, and that’s just who I was. At this point
there was little if any awareness of drugs or altered
states. It was what it was. I spoke out loud, to no
one. My voice was deep and resonant, like an old
man’s. Of course. I WAS an old man.
At some point Buck Knight came in carrying a sheet
of plywood and turned on a bright electric light. He
was looking at me very strangely.
“Shee-it,” I said in that deep, old black voice.
“Uh, how ya doin’, man?” asked Buck.
“Shee-it. I don’t know. You gonna cut that wood?
Hey man, you’re white.”
“I know that. I’ve always been white. I was born
white.”
(I was seeing a white man as a white man for the
first time. He looked washed-out, bleached, anemic.
I almost felt sorry for him.)
I wandered outside, onto the large deck where my
little houseboat was tied up next to the barge. Even
though I knew this was Sausalito, it seemed like the
Mississippi Delta, in the same way the sun had seemed
to be out back at the heliport. Maggie was in the
houseboat. Her appearance was no surprise; she had
light skin but her features were definitely African,
and she seemed to have gained around fifty pounds. I
was an old black man and she was my old fat black
wife. Whether she was “going along with the gag” or
having the same trip as I was didn't matter. That's
just how it was.
I picked up a guitar and played a blues figure.
It sounded like “Down, down, down by the river,” so I
sang, “Down, down, down by the river.” The words
kept coming, from where I don’t know, but they all
fit, and all made sense, from the basic river-mud
reality of standing down by the river to the infinite
cycle of death and rebirth. I been down, down, down
by the river...a thousand times or more....and every
time I see it again...I know I been there before....
This went on for some fifty to a hundred verses,
and of course the paper I wrote it on was lost
immediately. The old black man wrote it, but while he
was writing, I came seeping back into the body as it
changed back to a young white one, and lost the paper.
The transition back to my “normal” self was pretty
rocky. Lots of short circuits in the brain; little
bolts of lightning, paranoia and headache. Around
this time (it was still dark out) Joey the drummer
came aboard looking like a big rodent and said, “Do
you have any cheese? I gotta have some cheese.” I
gave him a slab of Monterey Jack which he munched
furiously, apologizing for his manners by saying,
“God, I just can’t help myself.”
I knew what he meant.
Penny Woodstock was the wife of Michael Woodstock,
the hippie-mystic. She's British, and could be
outrageous when drunk, but when she and Michael took
acid together, they became supernatural beings, at
least as far as they and anyone within their immediate
sphere of influence were concerned. They were always
surrounded by young, impressionable runaways and other
hapless waifs, who worshipped them. They weren’t
charlatans; sometimes they really were supernatural
beings, just as anyone who takes enough drugs becomes
a supernatural being at least once.
Amphetamine sometimes took me into extreme
psychotic hyper-sensitivity; paranoia isn’t quite the
right word. One morning at the Dredge, without sleep
for three or four nights, I happened across Penny
Woodstock and she was in a rotten mood. When I said
something or other she didn’t like, she snapped, “You
better not mess with me, Jeffrey. Leave me alone or
you’ll be sorry.” The vibes were pretty bad all
around, and I believed her. To reach my boat, I had
to cross the Kupreanov, a huge open tugboat hull, with
only deck beams to walk on. Normally this was a snap,
part of the normal environment. This time I slipped
and fell into the hull, nearly breaking my leg. As I
climbed back out, there was Penny, pointing her bony
finger and saying, “There’s a warning for you,
Jeffrey. Don’t forget I’m a witch, and I could hurt
you any time I wanted.” I didn’t doubt her a bit.
This account of a Redlegs gig was written by Penny
Woodstock in the June 21, 1975 issue of the Garlic
Press (waterfront newspaper):
“The most insane night I can remember (there were
others I don’t remember) was the night the Redlegs
played at the Old Mill in Mill Valley, about two years
ago. The manager of the bar couldn’t believe it when
nearly two hundred scruffy, waterlogged drunks showed
up for the night. His waitresses fought through the
crowd to get to the tables, only to find when they got
there that all the drinks had been taken. This
happened over and over again. He couldn’t stop the
people from dancing on the tables, and outside on the
pavement people were lying on the sidewalk snogging
and drinking themselves into an outrageous stupor. As
the band played, [Toothless] Tom Woods played the
bongo drums on top of the tallest amplifier about two
feet from the ceiling. As the night came to a head
most of the tables and chairs got crushed and I
vaguely remember some squad cars arriving. I think
everyone had a good time that night. Nobody could
possibly remember it as well as that bar manager. I
went around there the next morning and heard him
telling his regulars that it was the biggest drawing
for a group he ever had. But he would never be able
to hire the Redlegs again.”
What Penny did not hear the bar manager say was
(he may not have known yet himself) that as a direct
result of the Redlegs’ appearance, the Old Mill bar,
venerable Mill Valley landmark, would shut down
forever, be sold and turned into a proto-yuppie fern
bar.
What I can remember is the huge crowd for such a
small place, wild dancing and destruction, and the
“guest” appearances of two local “rock stars,” David
Clayton-Thomas of Blood Sweat and Tears, and John
Cippolina of Quicksilver Messenger Service. All I can
recall about Clayton-Thomas is that at some point he
was there in front of me with a microphone singing
some song, I have no idea what.
Cippolina had played in a band with Adam Fourman
when they were in high school, and now he was a famous
guitar “hero” with a big group. He came into the bar
and stood in front of the stage carefully surveying
our equipment. He left and came back with a guitar,
and an amplifier which he knew would overpower
everything we had. After setting up this rig and
without exchanging a friendly greeting with anyone in
the band, he began playing not with but against the
band, and at a greater decibel level. The resulting
tension may or may not have contributed to the
destruction of the bar.
I may never know how we got some of these gigs.
In the Garden of Earthly Delights, we looked ordinary.
The place was full of big fat Hell’s Angels,
pimply-faced greaseballs, spaced-out hippies, black
and white drag queens, and one thalidomide dwarf named
Shorty.
The floor was covered with sawdust, and I noted
the rugged construction of the tables and chairs. No
one here was going to police the dance floor, or tell
the band to turn the volume down.
I went to the bar and ordered Jim Beam. Next to
me was Shorty, the thalidomide dwarf. He was three
feet tall. In place of arms he had flippers at the
shoulders, each with two or three rudimentary fingers.
He wore a white T-shirt and loose fitting black
shorts, and was barefooted. He drank Budweiser in
long neck bottles by getting a firm grip on the bottle
neck with his teeth and throwing his head back.
Shorty loved music. His biggest complaint about
his condition was that he wished he could play the
saxophone, but listening and dancing would have to do.
He had long thick black hair and a full beard.
Nowhere in the movies or anywhere else had I seen a
dwarf or midget who was a hippie, or freak. Jeremy,
halfway to the Green Slime stage, joined us at the
bar. He struck up a conversation with Shorty, and I
went to help set up band equipment.
After the first set I ran into Jeremy again. He
looked shaky.
“I went in to take a leak,” he said, “And Shorty
was right in front of me. He turned and looked up at
me and I thought, Jesus, he’s gonna ask me to HOLD it
for him.”
The Green Slime grimace stretched across his face
as his eyes rolled slowly toward the ceiling and back.
“But then he just got himself over the toilet with
his knee up, and let go out the bottom of his shorts.
He did pretty good, really. Hardly got any on him.”
The room was thick with marijuana smoke and the
reek of spilled beer. People came and went in small
groups, going here for line of coke and there for a
balloon of heroin. Jack the Fluke, returning from one
of these forays, told me excitedly how he had gone
upstairs to get high, and met a girl who gave him a
blow job in her Volkswagen. He was particularly eager
to explain about the “spermatozoa getting all over the
seat,” as if to clarify that fat men had some too.
The climax of the evening came when a blond hippie
girl began screaming obscenities and making
threatening gestures at the band. She picked up a
heavy glass beer mug and hurled it at the stage,
narrowly missing Maggie’s head. In seconds a riot
erupted, a classic barroom brawl with fists and
furniture flying. As the waterfront heavies like Sam
Anderson and Dean Puchalski dealt with the fracas, we
made our escape before the police came.
The worst drug of all was PCP, or Angel Dust. It
caused the heaviest brain damage, and made more people
into basket cases than the rest of them put together.
PCP was believed to be the dope they put in those
darts to stun elephants. A few c.c.'s of this stuff
could drop a charging bull rhinoceros in his tracks,
and there were human beings taking it for kicks. I had
taken PCP before and hated it. My brain had felt like
melting plastic. It was the one drug I would never
have taken again voluntarily.
Twelve-string Pete from Down the Street, a
waterfront regular and PCP brain damage case, drowned
in a swimming pool in San Rafael. No one doubted that
Pete believed he could breathe under water.
There was never a lack of bizarre characters on
the waterfront. When Chris Roberts declared himself a
“magnet for degenerates,” he was taking more than his
share of credit, but they were there all right, and
usually tolerated. It was almost impossible to be
ostracized from Gate 6. Almost.
When Jim Shocker moved onto Dino Valenti’s
houseboat nobody paid much attention. He looked like
a musician--always carrying a guitar case, long hair,
stylish clothes, and platform shoes. He tried very
hard to sound hip. If anyone said hello, he’d respond
with, “What it is,” or “Heavy times, bro’.” Nobody
paid much attention.
He knew I played guitar with the Redlegs, and
started inviting me over to look at his instruments.
There was always at least one really fine guitar at
his place. He didn’t play very well, but as a guitar
owner he was great. I saw him on the dock one
afternoon, carrying another guitar case.
“Hey bro’, what it is. You gotta check out this
guitar, man. It's a Gibson J-200. Natural wood.
Really bad axe. Heavy times, man.”
It was a nice guitar all right. I played it a
little and gave it back. He was pleased that I liked
it, and poured me a glass of brandy.
“You gotta hear this record, man, listen to the
words. It’s really heavy.”
He put on an Elton John song called “Levon.” It
was something about a guy who called his child
“Jesus.” That must have been the heavy part, but I
didn’t care for the song much, and got up to leave.
“That's not really my cup of tea, Jim,” I said,
“But I like the guitar. Thanks for the drink. I'll
see you later.”
“Wait a minute, bro’, you wanna get high? I’ve
got some pure coke here. How ‘bout a couple of
lines?”
“Why not?” There was no speed around and I could
use the lift. He laid out two huge lines on the table
and handed me a straw. I should have known something
was wrong when he didn’t take some first for himself.
Cocaine people always took some first, and usually the
bigger line.
I snorted up the powder, finished the drink, and
woke up six hours later in a puddle in the parking
lot. It was raining. Someone was leaning over me,
shaking my arms.
“Jesus Christ, I thought you were dead. What
happened?”
“Who’s that?” I asked. My voice was an octave
higher than usual, as if I had inhaled helium, and I
couldn't see anything.
“Jack.”
“Jack? Jack the Fluke?”
“Jesus Christ, yes. Jack the Fluke. What the fuck
happened to you?”
“Where are we, Jack? What happened to Jim?” I
squeaked.
My mouth tasted like rubber, the air smelled like
rubber, and I sounded like Donald Duck.
“The parking lot. Jim who?” said Jack. He was
dragging me by the armpits, and I felt the gravel turn
to wood under me.
“Rubber Duck,” I said. “Rubber Duck, rubby duck,
Rub-ber Duck.” I felt like oily jello being squeezed
through subterranean rubber tubes.
“Jim who? Who the fuck is Jim? What’s this rubber
duck shit?”
“I thought he was dead,” Jack was saying to
somebody. “I think he's gone blind.”
I was on the couch in the Oakland shop. The
lights were on and I could see, but everything was
black and white and two-dimensional, like TV.
“Rubber Duck,” I said in my helium duck-voice.
“Not coke. PCP. Rubber Duck. Dosed with Rubber Duck.
Jim Shocker.”
“Hey, Blind Jeff Dead Boy. What happened?” It was
Joey.
“Jim Shocker,” I said. “Elephant tranquilizer.
Said it was coke. Are you all right? Is Maggie all
right?” Somehow I thought everyone else had been
dosed too. My squeaky voice sounded like it was coming
from somewhere else.
“Elephant Tranquilizer? That creep.”
Eventually I was able to relate that I had taken
the drug in Shocker’s place and been found by Jack the
Fluke in the parking lot. I had no memory beyond
sniffing the powder and getting dizzy in the
houseboat.
The squeaky voice faded in a few hours but the
rubber sensations and disorientation stayed for two or
three days, and I was able to walk around in four.
Jim Shocker was gone, moved out with no forwarding
address. Nobody ever mentioned what happened to him
and I never asked.
“Rubber Duck” caught on as a nickname for PCP, but
it’s a deceptively benign-sounding term. I wouldn’t
recommend it to a rhinoceros.
Tom Anderson had been something of a big-shot on
the Sausalito waterfront in the late 60’s. He ran a
boat yard and marine railway. Fishermen and tugboat
captains hauled out their boats at Anderson’s. It was
Real Man stuff, and Tom Anderson did it all proudly,
in a Real Man way. Before leaving for parts unknown,
he made a movie. It was called “The
E-Wreck-Ta-Cator,” about a man who builds a machine
whose sole purpose is to self-destruct. Written and
produced by Tom Anderson, the film starred Tom
Anderson as the crazed builder of the machine. In my
pre-waterfront days, I had met Anderson briefly in San
Francisco when I happened into a gig playing guitar on
his movie soundtrack, but hadn’t really paid much
attention to him.
In 1973 word came around that Tom Anderson was
coming back. Everyone was talking about it. The
amount of hubbub surrounding this rumor puzzled me.
What was the big deal? I found out when he roared
into Gate Six is his overpowered tugboat, throwing up
a wake that nearly capsized half the houseboats. Tom
Anderson was an egomaniac, so full of himself that his
face was red and shiny, the skin drawn tight like an
overinflated balloon. I hadn’t seen this at the
recording session because he was out of his element
there.
Joe Tate, the unofficial “boss” of Gate Six, felt
it necessary to go out in his boat to “greet”
Anderson. The encounter was tense and blustery, like
two dogs snarling and snapping at each other. What
everyone besides me knew was that Anderson would try
and seat himself as top dog no matter what it took.
The first move Anderson made was to buy the
Oakland. He evicted everyone, built a fence around
the deck, and played ponderous Wagnerian opera records
at peak volume while standing on his deck like a Laird
of the
Manor. He wondered why nobody liked him.
Steve Webber, a new arrival who was acting as the
band’s equipment manager and sound engineer, made a
heroic attempt to deal with Anderson. First, he tried
to goad him into a fistfight by tearing down part of
the fence. Anderson responded very calmly by calling
the police, who arrested Webber and took him downtown.
While Steve was in jail, graffiti appeared around
Gate 6: “Free Steve Webber.” This, combined with his
sharp eye for a bargain earned him the name “Free
Steve.”
When Free Steve was released, he wasn’t through
with Tom. Anderson had made the mistake of publicly
admitting that he had a “thing” about fecal matter; he
couldn’t even tolerate changing his own child’s
diaper. Armed with this information, Free Steve took
it upon himself to pack Anderson’s sewer outlet pipe
with concrete. When his toilet backed up, Anderson
said nothing, held his breath and managed to fix the
pipe.
What’s the matter with you people?” he asked me
one day. What he meant, but didn’t say, was Why
aren’t you all bowing and scraping at my feet? Don’t
you realize you’re in the presence of royalty?
I tried to explain that we were a cooperative
community, interdependent, and had achieved a certain
symbiosis, a harmony of existence. There was no room
for a king.
“What it comes down to Tom, in street language, is
this: Everything is everything, everything is one.
But you think you are everything, and everyone else
around here knows you are not.”
He said, “I can’t accept that.”
Less than a week later, Tom Anderson killed
himself with a .32 caliber pistol.
Sgt. Bill was a rare cop.
He used to park his cruiser in a vacant lot near
one of our illegally-placed landing docks, and watch
the boats go by. I first met him under very
unpleasant circumstances, at a wake we were having for
a recently drowned year-old child.
We had taken a barge to Schoonmaker beach and run
it aground purposely. The Schoonmaker property was
not technically a public beach, but at the time nobody
bothered people who came and left by boat. Dean had a
generator on the barge and we used it to power the
electric band equipment.
A barbecue fire was roaring on the beach, we had
three kegs of beer and gallons of Red Mountain, and
the sorrow over the child’s death was being exorcised.
It was a great relief to everyone to be partying
after the period of mourning.
Someone somewhere complained about the loud music,
and the cops showed up, twenty or thirty of them in
full riot costume. Emotions were running high that
day. A number of people were immediately ready to
take the cops on, and started cursing and throwing
bottles at them. I got on the mike and convinced my
friends to cool it, then jumped down onto the beach
and walked over to the head cop, Sgt. Bill. This was
not his first time at a Redlegs party, and he looked
almost scared. I had never really spoken with him
before.
“Jesus, you guys,” he said, looking ludicrous in
his riot helmet. “Can't you just not play so loud, so
we don’t have to go through this bullshit?”
“Look, Sergeant,” I said. “This isn't any regular
party. See that woman over there? And the guy she’s
with? Their baby died two weeks ago. He drowned.
Maybe you can understand how important it is for these
people to get their feelings out. We’ve all got kids
and we all live on the water. Do you get what I’m
saying? We don’t want trouble any more than you do.”
“Well, can’t you PLEASE make the music quieter?”
He was nearly in tears. “They'll have my ass if
there's another complaint. Jesus. Their BABY died?”
The cops left and didn’t return. Maybe we really did
turn the volume down.
After that I started seeing him parked in the
vacant lot. At first I just said hello, but after a
while we started talking. With drugs and
paraphernalia in my pocket, and a knife on my belt, I
would sit in the police car with him and talk about
life on the water, and rock & roll music. Once, we
had a conversation about whether a knife is a weapon
or a tool. He was trained to consider it a weapon.
Sailors as well as hunters, loggers and so forth carry
knives openly. The blades are indispensable tools,
necessary in everyday life. If a line gets fouled
around your leg and there’s an anchor attached to it
that was just thrown overboard, you better be quick
and your knife better be sharp. The sergeant saw my
point.
He was an authority on ‘5O’s music. Once he
demonstrated a subtle syncopated inflection that Ricky
Nelson used in “Be Bop Baby.” Sgt. Bill had a good
singing voice, and a real feeling for music.
The last time I saw him, Salty and I were walking
along the old railroad tracks by the Gerhardt sheet
metal factory. It was four in the morning. We were
checking dumpsters and Goodwill boxes on our way to
the 7-11 for junk food. Just walking down the road
minding our own business, you might say, when two cop
cars drove up to us with their lights flashing. Sgt.
Bill was driving one of them.
“Oh, no, not YOU guys.”
“Yep, us guys, Bill. What’s going on?”
“A burglar alarm went off in the Gerhardt
building. You guys been poking around in there?”
“No, man, come on. We're goin’ to the 7-11 for
burritos. We didn't hear any alarm, and we just
walked past the joint.”
I was telling the truth, and he believed it.
“You guys wait here,” he said, “I’ll check out the
building. Stick around, there’s something I want to
show you.”
After determining that the alarm had been false,
the cop in the second cruiser drove away and Sgt. Bill
returned as promised. He opened the passenger door
and said, “Get in.” I got in front, Salty in back.
“Here, look at this,” Sgt. Bill said. He produced
a few typewritten sheets of paper.
“What is it?”
“It’s a poem I got from a guy in San Quentin, in
for murdering his girlfriend, or his whore. He’s a
pimp. It’s fantastic. Read it.”
It was a long, involved epic poem of drugs,
madness, and murder, written in the darkest, nastiest,
cruelest, most hard-edged inner city ghetto language I
had ever heard. Thoroughly unpleasant and
frightening, yet perversely fascinating. The narrator
was a pimp with a monstrous cocaine habit and all the
cold, violent insanity that goes with it. It told of
the whore not being able to get enough money for his
drugs, the pimp cursing and threatening, eventually
beating her until she was dead.
“Read it out loud,” said the Sergeant, “The last
part.”
Salty had been silent the whole time, but when I
read the last part, he said, “Jesus...”
The whore was dead but the pimp's rage was not
satisfied. He took out a knife and hacked away at the
body and finally “Cut the bitch’s head off and kicked
it out the door.”
At this last part Sgt. Bill was beside himself.
He was genuinely worked up, loving it.
“God, that’s FANTASTIC,” he said. “Read it
again.”
Salty was staring hard at the Sergeant. So was I.
I read it again and the Sergeant started sweating
and hooting out loud, almost in convulsions.
“Yeah, yeah,” he shouted, “That's great, wow!”
“Hey, we gotta get some burritos,” said Salty.
Salty was a bizarre guy, but this was getting too
weird even for him.
“Yeah, right,” I said. “Hey Bill, uh, thanks for
letting me read the poem. We need something to eat.”
Sgt. Bill composed himself and said, “Okay guys.
Stay out of trouble, huh?”
Note: Sergeant Bill, as of 1997, was and still
may be a detective for the Albany (East Bay) police
dept., where he dressed up as Elvis and sang songs
about traffic safety to high school kids.
Znargh -- from “Zharghmobile.” Eventually came to
mean anything ugly and/or dangerous, particularly
submerged marine wreckage or other navigational
hazards. “Watch out for that znargh, dead ahead.”
Douchenozzleowitzski, BombachurchBukowski -- poem
(titled “Bottom Job On Nightmare Beach”) reflecting
several waterfront colloquialisms of the period,
Reggae rhetoric and important literary influences.
Done in bottom paint on the “Happiness.”
The word “douchebag,” introduced to the local jargon
as a catch-all term by Jim Gibbons, enjoyed a period
of great notoriety, with at least as many meanings and
semantic variations as “fuck.” “Nozzle” took on
multiple meanings as well, and the compound
“douchenozzle” enjoyed various interpretations.
“Owitzski” came from the practice of combining various
Jewish and Polish name suffixes. Taken past the edge
of silliness, this (pre-political correctness)
syllable-wrenching produced such utterances as
“Gold-Silver-Baum-Bloom-Stein-Berg-Owitz-ski.” Goldie,
a Jewish man from New Jersey, took particular delight
in this. “Bombachurch” is from a Bob Marley and the
Wailers song. “...And I feel like bombing a
church...Now that you know the preacher is lying.”
“Bukowski” should need no explanation.
“I am a hoo-hah of the hoo-hah, but my old lady is
of the other persuasion” -- Green Slime's explanation
of the difficulties stemming from being brought up
Catholic and marrying a Jewish woman. This statement
was made one Thanksgiving to the befuddlement of a
couple who were someone’s outside friends and making
their first visit to the waterfront, and was
oft-quoted.
Shit-pie Doodle -- Janice Speck’s term for
twinkies, ding-dongs and the like.
“Stinking pathetic ghoul music” -- My comment on a
Bobby Goldsboro song.
“What loco motive got me on this train of
thought?” -- Dredge
“Inability to concentrate on long-range goals is a
lower middle class syndrome” -- Buck Knight said it;
he probably read it somewhere. It certainly applied
to me.
Buck Bubbles and his Biodegradable Booze Band --
There were no musicians in the group, and Gibbons was
the drummer. They wrote a song about serial killer
Juan Corona, to the tune of “Wolverton Mountain”:
They say don’t go to Yuba City
If you’re lookin’ for a job
‘Cause Juan Corona has a sharp machete
And he’s workin’ for Beezlebub
“Physical Ed, smells like he's dead, like a coat
he got from a bum.” -- Kathy Ash’s ode to Joey
Crunch's cousin,
Eddie Crash -- So called for his tendency to pass
out instantly when drunk, even when walking, for
instance on a narrow plank across water. He took some
good tumbles and splashes. Also known as Ed the Bed.
Wowie Zowie Zorcho Zingbop -- According to Joe
Tate, what it felt like to be high on mescaline in
those days.
“Wonderful” Russell -- a Krishna groupie. Not
actually one of those people chanting in robes, he
liked the idea of it but apparently didn’t want to get
really involved. So he built his houseboat to look
like the Taj Mahal, with a little white dome, and
followed the Krishnas around and argued their case to
anyone who would listen. A devotee of the devotees.
Achieved his fifteen minutes of fame in the San
Francisco Chronicle front-page photo of tense
confrontation between him and a Marin County sheriff
when his houseboat was towed to the heliport for
“abatement” -- the famous gun and knife shot.
Mr. Joy -- Parking lot weirdo who walked around
bent over like a hunchback, looking up sideways at
people and saying, with a miserably pained expression,
“My name is John O’ Connor and I bring joy.” Once
attacked Captain Garbage with a propane tank.
“Every creep has an asshole, but not every asshole
has a creep.” -- Jack the Fluke on the difference an
asshole and a creep.
“I don’t know nothin’ about the law except how to
get in trouble.” -- Brian “Beppo” Petersen on legal
matters.
“I feel bad when I win and worse when I lose” --
“Free” Steve Webber, a US Navy veteran, on poker.
He was only person I ever knew who went around
calling everyone “brother” and really meant it.
“Brother” Martin had all the characteristics of a
religious pilgrim without belonging to any order or
discipline, a “seeker” in the true sense. The problem
was, he wasn’t finding the answers and it frustrated
him. Eventually, Brother Martin tried more and
stronger drugs, including Rubber Duck, apparently to
no avail. As his behavior became more and more
unorthodox, people said he was crazy, and Brother
Martin went on the Sausalito waterfront’s growing list
of tolerated borderline or outright lunatics.
But like any “crazy” or “psychotic” person, Martin
had some clear insights into many human problems and
contradictions. A gentle man, he sincerely wondered
about the institution of marriage. His own wife had
driven him away by having overt affairs with a number
of different men. Rather than curse her or them,
Martin stood back and examined the wisdom of rigid
lifetime commitment, and not surprisingly found it
lacking. Brother Martin was also troubled by money,
and how it took over people’s lives. When I discussed
these matters with him, he didn’t seem crazy at all.
The band was playing one night at Saul Rouda’s
movie studio at the old Bob’s Boatyard by the Napa
Street Pier. It was a typical Redlegs party, with
everybody dancing and drunk or high on something, and
utterly unpredictable. The first surprise that night
was the arrival of June Pointer, who asked to sing
with the band.
“What do you want to sing?” I asked her, having
never heard a single Pointer Sisters record.
“Wang Dang Doodle.” She was tipping and teetering,
and sort of giggling. This wasn’t the first party
she’s been to that night.
“How’s it go?”
“You know, Wang Dang Doodle...”
I didn’t know. I looked at Kim, and he didn’t
know. Joey didn’t know. Joe was out somewhere, but
was I sure he didn’t know. So she just started
singing. We found the key and faked it. Years later I
heard the record and laughed because it only had one
chord, so I figure it must have been all right.
After June dissolved into the crowd, we began
another song and Brother Martin appeared in front of
the band. He had an intense look in his eye, and he
was staring right at me. As the band played on, he
kept the intense eye-to-eye contact going and reached
into his pocket. First, he pulled out a twenty dollar
bill. Next, a Bic lighter. I was getting interested
now. “Go ahead, I yelled over the music. “Go for
it.”
Martin shook his head.
“Do it, Martin! Burn it up!”
He shook his head again, but kept holding out the
money and lighter. I pointed at myself and he nodded.
He wanted me to do it. First, he gave me the bill,
indicating that I could just keep it if I wanted, but
something felt important about this, something bigger
than a mere twenty dollars. But why didn’t he just
burn the twenty himself? Martin held out the lighter.
I turned to Joey and Kim and motioned them to keep
playing.
With the bill in my left hand, the lighter in my
right, the bass and drums churning away and Brother
Martin standing there like a mad soothsayer, I lit the
money and held it until only a burning corner remained
in my hand. It fell to the floor, I stomped it out
and that was it.
Or was it? Brother Martin continued to suffer
under the strain of day-to-day mundane life, finding
nothing to encourage his quest for meaning. Less than
a year after the money burning incident he jumped off
the Golden Gate Bridge, going down in the records as
number six hundred thirty-something.
It wasn’t long after Martin’s death that I started
getting strange phone calls from back east. The calls
came in at the stern apartment of the Oakland, which
was odd in itself. The place was occupied at the time
by Jack Hurley. Jack had authored his own deck of
tarot cards, and he and his wife, Rae, were into some
occult and esoteric activities that would have been
cause for much suspicion outside the waterfront, or a
lynching outside of California. Hurley had predicted
some sort of major event in my life. It was never
made clear how or why the calls came to his place.
The first call was from Bob Shearer, who had been
the singer in my first rock and roll band back in
Unionville, Connecticut. He told me a detective was
looking for me. The search had started at my ten-year
high school reunion. No one there had known where I
was, but my former classmates suggested the detective
look up Shearer.
Shearer suggested I call a certain reporter from
the Hartford Courant, who was also involved in the
search, but he also advised me to be careful if I was
involved with drugs or any other illegal activities.
Which of course I was. So I told him to give Hurley’s
number to the reporter and she could call me if it was
that big a deal.
The reporter called the next day. She was very
excited and admitted that getting me on the phone
meant a scoop for her. I was the object of a national
search. She wouldn’t give me all the details, but did
tell me my grandmother had died and left me a sizable
inheritance. I authorized her to give the phone
number to the detective who called almost immediately.
He drilled me with questions about my personal life
and got some long-lost relatives in on a conference
call. When the relatives were satisfied with who I
was, the detective told me the amount of the
inheritance was $20,000.
Somewhere between the time of the phone calls and
the arrival of the check, I was struck with a vision
of Brother Martin and the twenty dollar bill. No one
in the pragmatic world of scientific cause-and-effect
would swallow this for a second, but there are times
when you know something intuitively. And what I knew
at that moment was that I had been given a twenty
dollar bill by a “crazy” man who had clear and
disturbing visions, I had burned the bill
ceremoniously at his insistence, he had committed
suicide in the most grandiose manner possible, dying
in the water on which my home floated, and shortly
thereafter I had received messages, at the home of a
known psychic, telling me I had inherited twenty
thousand dollars. As for the inheritance itself, I’ll
just say that it came at the worst possible time, and
I made no sound investments.
“Oh yeah, listen to THIS,” I said to the happy
carolers after enduring their versions of two or three
traditional Christmas songs:
“On the last say of Christmas my true love gave to me
Twelve bummers humming
Eleven lepers leaping
Ten hookers hitching
Nine toms a-peeping
Eight maidens mooing
Seven schwantzes schtupping
Six beasts a-baying
Five moldy things
Four falling turds
Three drenched hens
Two dirty gloves
And a narc hiding in a bare tree.”
“That’s UGLY,” said the bespectacled little girl
as the rest of the roving singers looked at me in
horror.
It was the Christmas I’d like to forget, solid
evidence of my descent into the dark side of the drug
experience. I’d been up on crank for two or three
nights and couldn’t find any more, but there was some
MDA around. On the way back from getting the MDA I
ran into April the groupie/junkie, who had some meth
and agreed to trade some with me.
She invited me to dinner; naturally I declined,
not being hungry at all and anxious to get on with
getting off. Even in the drug world, there’s a
certain amount of decorum involved, and I waited as
she started cooking. We did the trade and I decided
to mix the speed with the MDA, mixing them in the
spoon and shooting them up together. The combination
multiplied the effects of both, and my body and brain
were instantly surging with electric heat.
I talked rapidly and crazily at April as she ate
her pork chops, potatoes and gravy. After all, the
polite thing was to stay until she got high, too. She
finished the meal and wasted no time preparing her
injection. When the dope hit her she began talking in
the same manic fashion. Suddenly she said, “Excuse
me.” Casually, she stepped outside and vomited. It
was one of those long, singing, gurgling high-powered
projections she had become famous for. This was my
cue to leave, not that vomiting was socially
unacceptable. I had other reasons for not wanting to
hang around, not the least of which was that she might
want to have sex, and puking could have been
considered a breach of decorum if it came to that.
Besides, it was Christmas Eve and I had some things to
do.
For me, no amount of objectivity, cynicism or
protest can completely overcome what we know as the
“spirit of Christmas.” No matter how hard I may fight
it, a twinge of sentiment gets me sooner or later in
the season.
Michael Young once remarked, “I go places where
they’re eating spaghetti with no meat in the sauce but
they see the dope and out comes the money.” The
people he was talking about weren’t vegetarians, they
thought of a meal as incomplete without meat but were
always ready to sacrifice nutrition for drugs...
I had sacrificed Christmas for drugs this time.
That particular combination of drugs created a
sensation of excitement, well-being, and a strange
warmth all through my body, and the comedown the next
morning was a disastrous feeling of depression,
existential horror and cold. I lay all day under
every blanket in the boat, shivering, being rude to
Christmas visitors, and feeling all the guilt over
Christmas that I’d laughed at and shrugged off the
night before.
Drugs were getting to be not so wonderful.
The band began to degenerate, for the usual
reasons and probably more.
Drugs... Remember, this was the end of the
sixties. Everyone was having a good old time, smoking
pot and drinking beer. Everyone in the band had taken
LSD, and had some form of “transforming,” or
“mind-expanding” trip. (I use those terms cautiously.
There are no words adequate to describe the
psychedelic experience.)
Musical differences... Joey Brennan, the drummer,
was probably the best musician in the Redlegs band.
Drums were his only instrument, but he was better and
more musical at them than any drummer I or anyone
else in the Redlegs had ever worked with. After Joe
Tate bought the Richmond, it began to consume more and
more of his energy. His playing began to suffer and
this troubled -- no, disgusted -- Joey. What also
bothered Joey, and me as well, was that Joe Tate
seemed to be developing a chronic case of “something
to prove,” competing with other men on the waterfront
to see who could complete the biggest, baddest boat
project, getting involved in some kind of machismo
sweepstakes.
“I came here to play music and I don’t give a shit
about boats,” was Joey’s statement on the matter. We
might have seen this as an indication that Joey had no
intention of going on the “big” boat trip and that it
was therefore ultimately doomed, but by then no one
was seeing, or really wanted to see, the situation
clearly.
Joey started protesting. If Tate was playing
badly or out of tune, Joey would get off his drum
stool and move Joe’s amplifier, pointing the speakers
away so he wouldn’t have to hear so much of it. But
the more significant sign of Joey’s dissatisfaction
was his increasing use of heroin. This coincided with
my own use of methamphetamine. Thus Joey and I, the
musical partners that had come to California together
with a musical dream and realized it, began to drift
apart. On our trip from L.A. to San Francisco, we had
picked up a pair of hitchhikers, a young man and
woman. The woman was a speed freak and the man was a
downer-head who lived on barbiturates, or narcotics
when he could get them. During their ride with us
they argued constantly, each belittling the other’s
choice of drugs. This had been a long-standing joke
with Joey and me, and now it was happening to us.
Maggie dealt with all this by continuing to write
her own songs and do her various art projects, and
Kim, like always, didn’t seem to care much one way or
the other.
One reasonably certain sign that a musical group
is past its peak and beginning the disintegration
process is the addition of new members. (There’s a
metaphor for economic growth here somewhere...) Along
with increasing drug problems and the deteriorating
big-boat situation, the band’s musical direction was
changing.
Joe’s early musical and performance influences in
his home town of St. Louis, besides his mother’s
hellfire and brimstone Pentecostal tent revivals, had
been rhythm & blues musicians like Chuck Berry and Ike
Turner. Some of his own songs reflected these, but
he’d also listened to softer, more melodic stuff like
Brazilian jazz as well as classical and folk music,
and to me, his most interesting stuff was the eclectic
mix of all these styles in combination with the
“psychedelic,” folk-rock, “California” sound that came
from just being there. The Redlegs’ sound, at best,
was all this with a bit of salt water and sail canvas
added.
But now Joe was defaulting to his roots. The
“big, California” sound I liked so much was giving way
to choppier beats and more mundane lyrics. We played
more R&B songs; Joe seemed to want a sound like Ike &
Tina Turner’s. To this end three female backup
singers were recruited. They would be called the
“Bagettes,” named partly for San Francisco’s famous
sourdough bread loaves (baguettes), but also for
other, shall we say more colorful, uses of the word
“bag.”
The Bagettes were Cici Wilcoxon, Francine
Lowenberg and Carol Joy Harris. Cici was a waterfront
regular who maintained an outside solo career in music
and theater. Francine was a bona fide “valley girl,”
a recent arrival from the south who had taken up with
our part-time piano player, Adam. She could sing a
bitchin’ version of “Angel Baby.” Carol Joy was also
new on the scene. She was by conventional standards
the best singer of the trio and sang with two or three
different groups. For all their respective talent,
however, the Bagettes did not sound like the Ikettes.
We had fairly well stopped playing the best of our
music, and in other ways, little by little,
cooperation between us all was fading. Joe was
bothered by Joey’s refusal to get involved with the
Richmond. After all, it was supposed to be for the
band. But Joey saw Tate’s dedication to the boat as
abandonment of any meaningful commitment to music, and
it was the drummer’s keen intention to do whatever it
took advance his own musical evolution, and if
possible, career. At one point he joined another
group, called Bonewhite. This caught Tate’s
attention. He and I drove to their rehearsal space in
San Anselmo and listened to them. To us, it seemed
like a joke. It sounded as if they were writing their
arrangements around Joey’s drumming style and if he
stopped playing, the rest of them would fall
helplessly to the floor. Besides, in those days, most
activities being conducted on land by landlubbers
seemed to me shallow, colorless, two-dimensional.
“Reality-lite.” (After you’ve been bailing a leaking
boat with a five gallon bucket for a few hours, or
sailed in a storm fully expecting not to survive, it’s
difficult to sympathize with someone who’s upset over
a stain on the carpet or complaining of the sniffles).
But after we “rescued” Joey back from the land of the
half-dead, he continued his descent into the Land of
the Living Dead, or the “Enchantress” -- heroin.
Towards the end, our gigs became nightmares of
misplaced priorities. Joey had to have dope, I had to
have speed. Joe liked drugs but didn’t need them;
his larger weakness was girls. Kim, who didn’t care
much for the hard drugs, could occasionally drink
himself senseless. And Maggie, for her part, dabbled
in all the drugs but tried to maintain a relentlessly
positive attitude toward the whole scene. For this, I
ridiculed her as a “Pollyanna.”
The honeymoon was over, way over.
Joey tried going into drug detox but made the
mistake of going with Fat Pat. Together, they gobbled
all the valiums in the place and scored a bag the
minute the came out.
The great drummer, Joey “Crunch” Brennan was a Gemini
and true to all the astrological clichés, had two
personalities and was often terribly indecisive. He
even wrote a song about himself, called “Mama Get the
Hammer”:
Mama get the hammer, there’s a fly on Junior’s
head
Sister get the zip-gun, in case it isn’t dead
Poor little Junior was born with two heads
Stick him in the closet, stand him on his heads...
...Junior gets sad and filled with despair
For all the people with only one head to wear...
But there came a moment when Joey made a decision.
In order to get off heroin and save his own life, he
would have to return to New York and put himself in
the care of his strict Irish immigrant mother. Once
this decision was made, it could not be reversed. He
quit the band.
THE AIRPORT INCIDENT
When Joey left I’d been up for three days on
speed, and on the way to the airport I polished off a
pint of Jack Daniels. I was in that alternate reality
called “amphetamine psychosis,” or “paranoid
schizophrenia.” At the time I considered this a
normal state of mind.
Joey's departure meant the end of the band, for
real, and it was difficult for me to accept this fact.
Most of my identity was invested in the band -- far
more, I think, than the rest of them. I was hanging
on by a frayed thread.
Inside the United terminal I went to take a leak
and caught my reflection in the mirror. The image I
saw looked like it belonged in a strait jacket.
Sunglasses became an immediate, desperate necessity.
I had money but it seemed like the natural thing to
steal them, so I found the right kind and boosted
them, not more than two feet away from a San Mateo
County sheriff. I didn't know he was there until he
tapped me on the shoulder.
“Where are you going with those glasses?”
“How about if I just put them back?”
“Do you have I.D.?” I looked. I didn’t.
“Too bad. That means I have to put you under
arrest.”
I didn't get a chance to say good-bye to Joey.
In the airport substation, the cop told me to
empty my pockets. Out came the comb, cigarettes,
wallet, a few crumpled bills, and the short plastic
straw with the bag of white powder rolled up inside.
“Now this intrigues me,” he said, rolling the
straw between his thumb and forefinger. “What is it?”
“Methedrine,” I replied, “You know, speed,
crystal.”
“You mean like bennies or diet pills?”
“Yeah, but this is methamphetamine hydrochloride,
it’s highly refined, the best.”
“I see. And what do you do, take a sniff of this
when you want a little pick-me-up?”
“That’s right.”
He signalled to another, younger cop, who grabbed
my arms and pushed up my sleeves, exposing several
fresh puncture marks. He nearly spit. “When was the
last time you shot up ?”
If there had been any levity in the room, it was
gone now. I kept quiet. Now I was in a league with
murderers and child molesters. They booked and
handcuffed me, and shoved me into a squad car next to
a wimpy-looking businessman whose crime had been
telling a hijack joke in the airport.
At the San Mateo County Jail in Redwood City, I
made my phone call, to Maggie. I was so deranged, I
kept referring to the cop who busted me as my friend .
He stood next to me, laughing.
In the corridor on the way to the holding cell, a
strip-search was in progress. A tall, thin
dark-haired man, obviously crazed on coke or speed,
was spread-eagled against the wall naked, as a
rubber-gloved cop poked a metal rod up his ass. I
resolved never to hide anything up mine.
I heard a voice, a vaguely familiar voice. The
voice was coming from the holding cell. It was
singing, “It had to be you...”
As I neared the cell, I saw the Sun King. He shouted
my name and started singing. “Jeffrey, Jeffrey! It
had to be yooouu.......”
The other prisoners, who were sitting far away
from him as possible, turned and looked at me. Here
was no doubt the craziest, most repulsive individual
possible, a jailhouse nightmare who had alienated
every low-life criminal and fiend in the place, and he
was greeting me like a lost brother. I might have
opted for a strip-search.
He started babbling at me right away, and I did my
best to ignore him and keep looking at the floor.
Luckily for me, he was next in line for processing.
One of the men in the cell kept complaining
indignantly, insisting repeatedly to no one in
particular, “There's been a MISTAKE. I don’t know
why I’m HERE. I want to know WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING
ON. I don't BELONG here.” As he paced and strutted
around the cell in a mighty attempt to preserve his
dignity, I wondered where he thought he did belong.
In a luxury suite surrounded by beautiful women?
Pitching in the World Series? In the White House,
maybe?
Right next to the holding cell there was a metal
cabinet. One cop was constantly opening and closing
its doors, and there was the constant sound of metal
banging on metal. On closer scrutiny, I discovered
that the cabinet was full of restraint gear:
handcuffs, leg irons, billy clubs, blackjacks, metal
rods...and there was something funny about the cop. He
wasn’t actually doing anything with the stuff except
fondling it. Every few minutes he’d come back to the
cabinet, open the doors, and pick up an item. He'd
get a faraway gleam in his eye and stroke the
pain-inflicting objects. He took a set of handcuffs
and rubbed them up and down his cheek, like a child
with a teddy bear.
After dinner, a bowl of glutinous slime, my name
was called and I was processed -- fingerprints,
photograph, orange jumpsuit and rubber flip-flop
slippers. I sat in a cell with the other
newly-costumed inmates, engaged in the inevitable
“What Are You In For?” discussion. I was on safe
ground here; my response of “drugs and shoplifting”
was greeted amiably. The guy next to me did a
pantomime of shooting dope and looked at me
questioningly. I showed him my arms, and he grinned
his approval.
After a while we were escorted to our assigned
cells. Mine was overcrowded and the only place to
rest was the floor. There was a cement picnic table
in the cell, with a poker game in progress. The
table was covered with packs of cigarettes, serious
loot in the slam.
Two young black athletic types jogged in place,
running up the walls, counting every step, determined
to stay in shape. There was a TV in one corner, and
several white men were watching a German prison movie.
I was starting to come down, and things looked
grim, but I was struck by one thing: nowhere had I
seen such careful, painstaking good manners .
Every single man in that cell was the picture of
courtesy. There were no indignant men here.
At ten o'clock the lights went out. The poker
game had ended and I stretched out under the cement
table, falling into a twitchy amphetamine sleep. The
bell rang at six in the morning. My pounding headache
reminded me that I was not only crashing from speed,
but hung over from whiskey. We were marched into the
main hall for breakfast, watery, bitter coffee and a
bowl of cream of wheat with a definite taste of diesel
fuel. I was sitting there trying to eat when the Sun
King found me.
“Good morning, Jeffrey,” he said, his eyes
bulging out bigger than golf balls. “I’m happy. GOD,
I’m HAPPY. All men are stars, and all stars are
connected, and that's why I’m so HAPPY.”
He started singing in that horrible Johnny Mathis
vibrato.
“Wanderlust, boom boom boom BOOM boom boom....”
I gave him the iciest glare I could dredge up, and
he quieted down.
“I’ve got a present for you,” he said, and reached
into his jumpsuit. He pulled out a pouch of Bull
Durham and some rolling papers.
“Where did you get THAT?”
“I stole it from a guy in my cell.”
“Jesus CHRIST!”
I looked around, fully expecting a furious,
snarling monster to appear and murder the Sun King and
me with one blow. In his utterly irreparable,
out-of-this-world insanity, the Sun King had committed
the worst in-house sin. NOBODY stole a man's tobacco
in jail.
“Give it back,” I told him.
“I can’t. He’d kill me. They all think I'm
CRAZY.”
It was too late. He left the pouch on the table
and walked away, singing. “It had to be yoouuuu....”
I stuffed the Bull Durham into my pocket and
slouched back to the cell, trying to be invisible.
The prisoners were waiting their turns at the toilet
in the corner. Once again, impeccable courtesy was
the thing, but the air and noises in the room could
only be compared to an Interstate truck stop men's
room at peak morning rush. To keep from gagging,
everyone smoked heavily and breathed through his
mouth.
At nine o'clock, the trusties came around calling
names. It was time for court. We were taken into a
corridor and chained together in groups of six. To my
horror, I saw the Sun King being led to my group. To
my wonder and amazement, he didn’t mention the Bull
Durham. He didn’t even speak to me. He just stared
at the ceiling chanting, “I’m happy, I’m just an
orange on a tree, I have no mind.”
We rode to the courthouse in a green school bus
and were put in another holding cell. A man in a suit
stuck his head into the room and asked, “Does anyone
in here want a Public Defender?” He was greeted with
total silence. When he was halfway out the door I
snapped out of it and said, “Yeah, I do.”
He sat me down in a cubicle and explained that
since there was no previous record, I could plead
guilty to shoplifting, and the “narco beef” would be
dropped. I would get off with a suspended sentence
and summary probation, which meant I didn't have to
report to anyone. I wondered aloud why none of the
other prisoners had opted for a P.D.
“Those guys are going back to the joint,” he
said. “They’re resigned to it. Totally
institutionalized. By the way, if you don't get
busted in San Mateo County for eighteen months, your
record will be wiped.”
The waterfront, as Joey the drummer sometimes
described it, was free, freaky and loose. The only
laws in effect were the laws of nature and physics.
You can’t thumb your nose at a 6O mile-an-hour wind or
deny the necessity of fixing a hole in a sinking boat,
but the boundaries of human behavior, morality and
conventional wisdom were tested, pushed and stretched
in all directions.
One of my first revelations there was small but
significant: Nothing horrible will happen if your
socks don’t match. In high school I would have
skipped a day rather than show up with different color
socks on. How much time and energy had I wasted in
the past worrying about such trivial things?
That little realization opened up a world of
questions about everyday things normally taken for
granted, assumed to be correct. When, with a little
scrutiny, the seeming validity of much of what I had
learned growing up in America fell apart like a cheap
suitcase, I began to understand why: a great deal of
“normal” human behavior was based on fear, and most of
the fear was based on bullshit.
There were the little fears, like someone might
make fun of you if your socks don’t match. And there
were the big fears, like if you go sailing in rough
weather you might be capsized and drown. Or if you
take LSD you might go crazy and “never come back.” On
the waterfront, people regularly confronted such
fears, deliberately or not.
These largely unavoidable confrontations were
great equalizers, and functioned wonderfully as
population control. Those who couldn’t handle the
combination of immediate everyday survival and lack of
official authority figures didn’t last long, and
usually retreated to the normal world to take comfort
in the safety of conventional bullshit like the
importance of matching socks.
In the movie “King Of Hearts,” a small French town
is evacuated during World War II. The only people
left are the inmates of the insane asylum, who escape
and enter the empty town. They gravitate naturally to
different environments. One man finds the barbershop
and starts giving haircuts. Another winds up in the
circus and immediately retrains the animals. Likewise
the grocer, the prostitute, musicians, etc. It turns
out they weren’t crazy at all, they had been punished
for being themselves.
The waterfront was the first place I had ever seen
where you weren’t punished for being yourself. No
wonder outsiders likened it to an insane asylum. For
one thing, no one was ever told “no.” Artistic
expression was never called frivolous or silly. It
was encouraged because it was necessary. When Joey
said, “If I couldn’t play the drums, I’d probably kill
somebody,” he wasn’t kidding. If he started playing
them in the middle of the night, no one told him to
stop. Instead, other insomniac musicians usually
showed up with their instruments. In the world of
mandatory matching socks, this sort of thing isn’t
allowed.
The old “Brown House” was located at the edge of
the parking lot near the Oakland pier. It was a sort
of community center where we had dinners, poker games,
and such. One day I found a can of beige paint and a
ladder, and painted a huge cartoon brain with a
cartoon dagger sticking into it on the side of the
Brown House. Under the brain I painted the words
“Brane Damage.” I spelled “Brain” that way purposely.
No one thought any of it even a bit odd. No one was
offended. The only comment I got was from Mary Winn,
who said, “You spelled ‘damage’ wrong.”
My only other attempt at art in the paint medium
was on the roof of the Hot Molecule. The SFO
helicopter flew directly over our houseboat several
times a day. To express my aggravation with the
noise, I painted a whirling helicopter rotor on one
half of the roof, and on the other half, the words
“Fuck You.”
It was Joanie, of Fat Pat and Joanie, that said
this when she greeted me at the door of the pilot
house on the roof of the Oakland. She and Fat Pat
were junkies, openly and unapologetically addicted to
heroin. They had glass syringes kept in velvet-lined
cases, just like Sherlock Holmes. A big shipment of
junk had arrived in town, and I was invited to share
the bounty.
The room was full of people in various stages of
preparing and shooting dope, and unlike many such
scenes the mood here was light, almost a party
atmosphere; there was more than enough heroin to go
around and it had been cheap.
Most heavy drug addicts maintain a surprisingly
clear insight into their condition, and Joanie’s
“living dead” greeting was humor based on truth. Her
eyes were ringed with wide, dark circles and her skin
was that grey-green color that the drug crowd called
an indoor tan. Looking around the room, one could
easily have described everyone there as zombies.
I used one of the glass syringes. The dope was
good and in a few seconds I felt fine, very nice. If
I looked like a corpse too, it didn’t matter. Why
worry about what other people think?
Everyone hears about the horrors of drugs,
especially junk, but while its eventual negative
effects are very bad, its good side is very good.
Just like that, it wipes away your physical
discomforts and leaves you feeling warm all over.
What it also does is dissolve all your neuroses and
worries, leaving you with a mind clear of bullshit.
I went downstairs to the shop and plunked around
on the piano, working out an arrangement for Joe’s
latest song, “A Matter of Time.” Maggie came in and
we worked on vocal backgrounds. Joanie and Fat Pat,
big Redlegs fans, came downstairs. They were in jolly
spirits and wanted to sing a song. Why not, we said,
and they did:
Well, I don’t like the way you comb your hair
I don’t like the way you act so square
Every time you’re here you make me feel like shit
Baby you’re just gonna have to split
Fuck you I hate you, split, baby
Fuck you I hate you, split, baby
Fuck you I hate you, split, baby
Ain’t no jive you’re leavin’ dead or alive
Now there’s a human sentiment that usually isn’t
expressed in song...
A few years later and a few miles farther down the
drug road, I really did look like a cadaver when I had
a visit from Bill Hall, the perennial candidate for
mayor of Mill Valley and secretary-treasurer of the
Gypsy Jokers motorcycle club. Hall was regarded as
somewhat eccentric, perhaps due to the fact that he
kept a working slot machine in his living room and
slept in a coffin. He and his girlfriend Caroline were
on their way to a party and dressed in all black.
With his greased black hair and gaunt features, he
looked like a smiling vampire. Caroline in her black
velvet dress was the image of Morticia Addams.
They wanted to invite me to the party, but I just
been through an agonizing paranoid session in the
mirror and felt it would best not to go anywhere. I
didn’t mention this, but they sensed it.
Spontaneously, in unison, they said, “Come on with us.
You’re looking really good today.” I had been a week
with hardly any sleep or food, could have starred in a
walking-corpse movie with no makeup, and these two
ghoulish-looking figures were telling me how wonderful
I looked.
How much further could it all go?
Most everybody on the waterfront was apolitical,
at least until the shit hit the fan on our own
doorstep. In the early “good old” days we had a single
token political guy. He was from Berkeley, and he was
our pet Communist. It was comical but sometimes
annoying to see him parading around in his army
fatigues, chanting “Power to the People,” “We Must
Unite Against the Oppressors” and such, because at the
time we had a beautifully spontaneous, completely
unself-conscious, natural anarchy going. This guy was
right in the middle of it and couldn’t see it, because
we weren’t militant. In time he exposed himself,
literally and figuratively. Every time the band
played, he threw off his clothes and cavorted
obstreperously through the crowds, his fist raised,
yelling slogans and demanding “More! More!” from the
band. He was the first Militant Naked Person I’d ever
seen. At one time or another, everyone on the
waterfront was a thief, including the Communist, but
he didn’t steal things. He “Liberated them for The
People,” and “The People” was always him.
The waterfront was Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll,
but it was also Boats, Seamanship and Survival. There
was no inclination for such foolishness as political
posturing or getting a job. If California fell into
the se